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Leaving church, Mrs. Peterson asked her husband, “Do you think that Johnson girl tints her hair?” “I didn’t even see her,” admitted Mr. Peterson. “And that dress Margie Hansen was wearing,” continued Mrs. Peterson, “Was that suitable for a mother of two?” “I didn’t notice that, either,” said Mr. Peterson. Mrs. Peterson snapped, “Oh, for heaven’s sake! A lot of good it does you to go to church!”
A guy goes into a bar with his pet octopus and says, “I bet $50.00 that no one here has a musical instrument that this octopus can’t play.” The people in the bar look around and someone fetches out an old guitar. The octopus picks it up, tunes the strings and starts playing. His owner pockets fifty bucks. Next comes a guy with a trumpet. The octopus takes the horn, wiggles the valves a few times, licks its lips and plays a fantastic jazz solo. His owner pockets another fifty bucks. The bartender disappears
Two blondes with hammers, Carol and Donna, were doing some Carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity house. Carol, who was nailing Down house siding, would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail , and Either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in. Donna, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, “Why are you Throwing those nails away?” Carol explained, “When I pull a nail out of my pouch, about half of Them have the head on the wrong end, and I throw them away.” Donna got completely upset and yelled,